Peeping Tom

>As per SuperAmazingMum and ManicMum’s Peeping Tom meme here is my real life love story.

I never imagined that I would meet my husband and the father of my children on my first day of University. In fact I didn’t know it until many years later. On arriving at the University of Bradford halls of residence I was on the lookout for a boyfriend, having never had a real one before, but the Man never even entered the radar for that. He just wasn’t my type but we got on really well as friends and he would let me watch Dawsons Creek on his TV even though he hated it and let me sleep in his bed (while he was relegated to the communal kitchen counter) when I was locked out of my room. We were always good friends but that was it.

Five months after starting university I did nab myself a boyfriend. He was lovely and we were together for two and a half years but we were very different people and I was not sure about our future. Two things highlighted this for me, the first was the Richard from Friends type moment (you know, the one where he tells Monica he’ll have kids “if you want to”) as he decided that after two years of telling me he never wanted to live in London that he would make the move “if that’s what I wanted” and the second was seeing the Man leaving a club with, lets call her “some Hussy”, which provoked a strong reaction in my gut which felt a lot like jealousy. For weeks I tried to deny this feeling as I was very confused, how could I like him, I had a boyfriend – it was a difficult time for me and as I don’t eat when I am stressed I actually lost weight.

After a stressful couple of months things finally came to a head when we were in the pub, drinking lemonade and watching Neighbours on the TV and I had to leave to meet my boyfriend and I realised I really didn’t want to, sitting in silence with the Man was more enticing than dinner with my boyfriend. So that was it, we broke up that night.

Things move fast at university when you don’t have a job to occupy you and only 15 hours of lectures (and you only bother going to 2) so within a few days the Man had some idea that he was a factor in our breakup (I cannot lie and when a mutual friend asked me if I liked someone else I caved as I had been hiding my secret for so long). As the direct person he is, he got straight to the heart of the matter and asked to “talk” – in the middle of the day, before any alcohol was even consumed! Was he crazy? So I stuttered not yet and proceeded to get very drunk in a club later that night (these being student days where every night was a different club, oh to be young).

What I didn’t know at the time was that almost at exactly the same time as I started to have these odd feelings towards him, he started feeling the same way and thank god he is a very open, honest and brave person as he told me exactly that. It was lovely and oh so cute as we both pondered what on earth to do about this for fear of ruining a fantastic friendship. So we headed back to my place to talk. We both agreed we wanted to kiss but should we, what if something went wrong, what if this wasn’t the right thing to do? The Man’s motto has always been “live by the coin, die by the coin” and so we decided heads we kiss, tails we don’t. Guess what came up – three times in a bloody row, tails!! So of course he threw the coin on the floor and kissed me anyway.

Ten months later we moved to London after graduation, two and a half years after that he proposed (which is worth another post in itself) and 18 months after that the most beautiful Boy in the world was born.

So thank you Bradford University and some Hussy.